How to help your loved ones give you a better present

It doesn’t matter if you do it by email or snail mail but if you consider the benefits, you’ll really want to learn how to write a good, grown up letter to Santa.

I’d like to encourage you and teach you how to speak up for what you want, especially at the time when people are looking for something to give you.

It applies to birthdays and special occasions too but we are heading for THE season of giving so I’ll use that as an example.

When you give loved ones clear clues about what you need as a gift, everybody wins, including the planet and the budget. Here are some tips on how it works.

I’d like to invite you to get clear on what would serve your life to receive and to express it in a letter to those who are looking for something to give you.

Just pausing to check what you’d like to receive will bring many benefits you are not currently experiencing.

Like giving more attention to your life’s priorities, where you need to feed YOUR life more, instead of using time up soaking up broadcast about others’ lives, via whatever device you’re using.

You know what I mean and…

Your lovely, specific and doable request to Santa will be a godsend to those who are stressing about getting the right present for you.

Headless chicken vs. human heart


We’re all running around like headless chickens, overwhelmed by the information overload and scared about there not being enough resources to meet our needs.

Yet ENORMOUS amount of energy, time and money is used on gift giving.

Especially around Christmas.

People are compelled to express their need for love, contribution and celebration but the bulk of the energy they use to do it is MEANT to make life more wonderful but isn’t.

You know it, I know it but mostly we act helpless about it.

What if we gave one another clues


What if there was a way to prevent well meant gifts that don’t make much difference and use up resources?

Part of the problem is that people can only do what’s doable for them.

People buy what they can afford and what they can think of and you end up getting many small things, while your bigger needs might go unmet.

To turn this phenomenon around would require you to think STRATEGICALLY about helping people to help you better.

You need to think through not only what you need but also how people could support you to access that.

Once you do, you can tell people that they could do this for you and why they’d want to.

And THEY could sigh with relief that now there is a doable thing they can contribute to you that would be SURE to nurture your needs rather than only attempting to.

Everybody wins!

Don’t you just love the possibility of that?

Sample letters to learn from

I can share two examples from my life where I’ve done the  strategic thinking and communicating about gifts.

One is writing a “wish list” letter before my birthday and the other writing a printable letter to Santa for clients (to ask for a gift voucher to hire my help).

With the wish list, I created a Paypal money pool where people could pay in whatever they’d spend on a card or a gift for me.

I also promised to send people a report on how I’d have spent the money.

I told them why it mattered to me: that I’d like the resources to go to something that would feed me longer than the card display on the window sill.

I’m still glowing from the joy of the gifts I bought with the larger amount of money that little contributions added up to. It felt fantastic to write to people to express REAL delight and satisfaction I experienced.

With the letter to Santa, I stepped into the shoes of people who’d love to get decluttering help from me but can’t afford it.

I’d like to invite you to look at that PRINTABLE letter to Santa  because it will give you an example of what it  needs to cover.

The key ingredients to write a letter to Santa:

To summarise, here are the key ingredients to help people get you a better present.

1. Get clear about what you need at this time.

2. Tell people what you’ve understood about it. (A letter is a good, digestible way to do it).

3. Say what difference it would make to you.

4. Explain how people could support this need by telling them what specific action they could take that’s likely doable and affordable for them.

NOTE: A good present doesn’t have to involve money! Think what would be simple for people to do but nurturing for you to receive.

You can suggest some “experience vouchers” you’d love to receive, such as: doing your chore for you when you can’t or  giving you a massage or altering an item of clothing for you.

5. Add any relevant info to make that action easier.

May this ingredients lists serve you well.

Ask Santa for a gift of decluttering voucher

I’m sharing the whole letter with you as an example to learn from but of course you’re welcome to ACTUALLY print the letter out and send to your Santas if you’d like a gift of decluttering handholding.

Geography is no longer a barrier as I’ve started offering online support for DIY makeovers as well.

Either way, you can view the letter to Santa now, just click on the letter picture here and on the page it’ll take you to: